Football Terms for Breastfeeding Folks
We, at Mamava, love football. (We also super love the Minnesota Vikings, the Indianapolis Colts, the Denver Broncos, the San Francisco 49ers, and the Chicago Bears because they all support their breastfeeding fans with Mamava pods.) Football and breastfeeding have more in common than just the “football hold”—that nursing position where you tuck baby under your arm. For one, they share a lot of fans (almost half of all NFL fans are women). So we’re flexing football’s lexicon to fit our off-the-field interests: feeding that kid, from the breast.
Running back
Football: An offensive player whose job is to carry the ball.
Breastfeeding: What you’re doing when—halfway through your morning commute—you realize you left your breast pump at home.
Flood
Football: When the offense puts multiple receivers in the same area of the field to outnumber the defense.
Breastfeeding: The breast milk situation when you have a super-strong letdown.
Audible
Football: A play change called by the quarterback at the line of scrimmage.
Breastfeeding: When baby bites and you scream.
Blitz
Football: When linebackers charge the quarterback as soon as he snaps the ball.
Breastfeeding: When baby attacks the breast like an angry lion as soon as you show some skin.
Bootleg
Football: When the quarterback fakes a handoff and runs with the ball “hidden” next to his hip.
Breastfeeding: That breast milk stashed WAY back in the freezer, away from the babysitter who tends to always thaw (ahem, waste) “extra” ounces.
Red zone
Football: The area between the 20-yard line and the goal.
Breastfeeding: Mastitis.
Pooch kick
Football: An intentionally short punt.
Breastfeeding: When a flailing infant jabs a heel into the soft space—that they created—in your lower abdominal area.
Sack
Football: When a quarterback is tackled, behind the line of scrimmage, before he can make a pass.
Breastfeeding: That thing you put your baby in so maybe they’ll sleep. And then so can you.
Strong side
Football: Side of the offense where there are more players. (Usually, the side with the tight end.)
Breastfeeding: The boob that makes more milk.
Hands to the face
Football: A penalty when a defender uses his hands to strike an offensive player’s face mask.
Breastfeeding: Kinda the same thing during a breastfeeding sesh—but sometimes it’s a sweet stroke instead of a strike. And no mask. Presumably.
Mamava designs solutions to empower breastfeeding and pumping parents on the go, like our freestanding lactation pods, Mamava’s lactation space locator app, and other helpful resources.
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